Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Big Mac Attacks Global Warming

In Japan, the government's offer of a half-price Big Mac in exchange for a pledge to fight global warming created such a response that it crashed a government website. Applicants pledged to do such things as to take a minute off their shower times to help the environment.

In other news , doctors attending the meeting of the European Society of Cardiology in Vienna expressed concern about the possible increase in deaths from cardiovascular disease as a result of global warming. The experts state that people with cardiovascular disease are more likely to have exacerbated problems when there is a sustained period of hot weather and point to the recent increase in deaths during the European heat wave this summer.

But let's face it, hot weather doesn't cause heart disease, heredity and lifestyle do. In Africa, heart disease is nearly unknown in rural areas but the incidence of heart disease is rising in more westernized urban regions, mainly because of lifestyle and dietary changes. That is, the western diet is full of fat and cholesterol and is bad for your heart. So while being in a very hot climate when you have cardiovascular disease increases your risk of death, being in a hot climate doesn't cause cardiovascular disease.

Which brings me back to the Big Mac. This popular sandwich from McDonalds, with its 29 grams of fat, 75 mg of cholesterol and 1040 grams of sodium, is the epitome of the heart attack diet. It seems to run contrary to their stated concerns about heart disease and global warming to offer you something that will only increase your risk of dying should the planet heat up as they expect it to. Heat will kill you! Quick, eat a Big Mac and don't shower!

This is why I can't understand global warming theory. It's just too complicated.


Janus Torrell said...

On a brighter note it may kill off the annoying ones faster

Andrea said...

Some things are too much to hope for.